The "F" Word

Glee tore down one of my least favorite words last week better than anyplace else I've ever seen:



It's proof there's always hope, and that pop culture is changing too.

It's a sign of the times.

Attack of the Homophobic Oranges

Forget the Mormons, the real threat to global gays may be as close as your local produce section.

Once you see the spectacle that awaits in the following, MAYBE NOT SAFE FOR WORK, film short from Spain, I promise you'll never look at oranges the same again.



Thanks to Homoneurotic for the heads up on this brilliant film "trailer" that will likely lead to the boycott of innocent Florida produce.

Death of a Guilty Pleasure

So, why a thought for an Irish boy band member who was found dead today when I ignore so many other celebrity deaths?

Because Boyzone's Stephen Gately was an optimistic voice at an important time in my life.

Anyone who's rummaged through my old cds knows I have an unexplainable loyalty to upbeat Irish boybands. It's a guilty pleasure you can feel free to blame on my daily doses of MTV the summer I lived in Ireland.

That alone would be enough reason for me to dust off the memories of music that simply makes me happy.

But Stephen Gately did something much more important, that likely went mostly unnoticed here in the United States. He came out to the world, when all convention said it would likely be inconvenient for him to be openly gay. In a world with few out entertainers, especially so early in their careers, it was heartening to see a young pop star fully, publicly embrace who he was, even if it involved beating the tabloids to the punch. As his solo career meandered off the pop charts, through London's West End and more-recently back to his boy band roots, he was important, if only because he chose not to hide an important part of his life from his fans.

Simply put, he was a public face for acceptance.

The news of his death today at 33, caught me off-guard.

The "Sacramento Community College Players" Tackle Gay Marriage

As good musical theater goes, this speaks (or sings?) for itself:



For more on the campaign to overturn Proposition 8 in California, check out Join The Impact.

If this country hadn't redefined marriage, black people still couldn't marry white people.

Keith Olbermann lent a heartfelt special comment to the disappointment over the passage of Proposition 8 in California:



The bottom line: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

Thanks, Keith.

You can read the full text HERE.

The Hope of a New Dawn

In the end, after months constanstly plugged in and glued to the TV it's fitting that on a historic night I finally got the news from the most old-school of sources. Driving downtown to catch up with some friends to toast apparent success, it was on the radio that I heard Barack Obama had been elected president of the United States.

As NPR was announcing that polls had closed on the west coast, and indeed the unlikeliest senator from Illinois had just made history, I suddenly got that same tingly feeling in my gut from August when I was fortunate enough to attend his dramatic acceptance of his party's nomination.

My gut then told me we were nominating a decent man for the job, and months later, I remain convinced of that today.

I can think of no better time to change directions in America. A nation battered down economically, stretched militarily and drained from decades of divisiveness needs someone to inspire them through tough times.

My hope for Barack Obama is that he uses the opportunity to become a great president for all of America, a difficult path when the temptation to veer the partisan way is enticing.

We must carefully remember the still-fresh example of his predecessor, who squandered the goodwill and opportunity of a nation by pandering to the extremes of partisanship.

The tingle in my gut gives me much hope. Time will tell.

As most big elections go, you can't necessarily win everything, and Tuesday night was no exception. While I applauded John McCain's graceful concession and cheered Obama's Grant Park celebration, there was a dark cloud in California brewing as the tallies started coming in for Proposition 8. As we celebrated the apex of racial equality, gay civil rights took a blow in the sunshine state.

It was an ironic twist that as Colorado finally rid itself of Marilyn Musgrave, one of the authors of the proposed Federal Marriage Ammendment, the thousands of same-sex couples that shared their vows in California this summer were told to get back in the closet.

As America celebrated a milestone in the march toward civil rights, some of those very same supporters shut the door on another minority that simply wants the same rights, responsibilities and opportunities that all Americans have.

Luckily as with presidents, the beauty of our political system is that ballot boxes are only markers in time. No setback will deny me the hope that one day I will legally be able to look my partner in the eye and say "until death do us part."

In the meantime I choose to be heartened that we came so very close in California. While there is still much hate in our nation today, there are more and more people everyday who are sick and tired of previous generations' false morality.

If an African-American can become president in the not so distant shadow of slavery and segregation, there is hope for the rest of us. It gives me more determination to live my life openly so that everyone knows my partner and I exist and we both ask and demand to be treated equally.

Barack Obama mentioned us in his speech in Denver, and he did so again in Chicago this week.

Marriage equality may have taken a shot or two on Tuesday, but it's a powerful dawn to have someone who simply even acknowledges you moving into the White House.

Yes we can.

It's more than an issue, this is our lives we're fighting for.

Proudly.

It's that time of year again here in Colorado, when the rainbow flags come out and I am supposed to be proud.

While it was affirming to me at one point to make it down to the thump-thump madness downtown here at Civic Center, I'm finding myself having similar thoughts about Pridefest this year as I do with, let's say, Valentine's Day.

Just as I loathe having to feel romantic on a set day each year, I find it odd that I have to be openly proud of myself just on a set day in June. It feels forced wishing random acquaintances a "happy gay day" at a generally tragic parade.

Don't get me wrong, I do think Pride celebrations as a whole do still serve an important role, mainly for people who are struggling with their own identities to see that there are many, many other people like them out there.

That is more important now perhaps than the stated of goals of broader community awareness of the gay community. Yes, there are still important political battles ahead, but winning over people's minds usually does not include shocking them into submission with the inevitable drag queens and leather chaps.

Let's just put it this way:

I am proud of who I am and the life I have.

I am proud of my partner of five years, whom I love very much.

I am proud to live my life openly and normally.

I am proud to be part of such amazing families, who love us both unequivocally.

I am proud of my friends, near-and-far, who have supported me through many things in my life.

I am proud of how far our nation has come culturally, despite the best efforts of those who would deny me rights my partner and I deserve.

I am proud of those who publicly take the risk to really stand up for who they are.

I am proud of all these things, every day. I am your friend, I am your neighbor, I am your fellow countryman.

So tomorrow, when I hang out with a small group of friends away from the ridiculous lines at the bars and the festival downtown, I'll be doing what I do all year long:

I'll be proud of exactly who I am -- and thankful.

You can sit there, you just can't sit THERE

Having now heard about this all day, and having watched it numerous times, I can't feel anything but impressed that a top-rated tv entertainer is marrying her partner this summer AND discussing it on her show with an awkward relic of a presidential candidate.


Times are clearly changing.

I am not a second class citizen.

WHEN THE MESSAGE OUT THERE IS SO HORRIBLE – THAT TO BE GAY, YOU CAN GET KILLED FOR IT:

WE NEED TO CHANGE THE MESSAGE.

Courting the vote

Having little clue of what he really stands for, I can't say I am really on the Barack Obama express. His populism, with only a smidge of substance, scares me.

It is nice, however, to be openly courted by him:

Hollywood hits the brake on the Brokeback Mountain effect

As surprising as it seemed that Brokeback [Mountain] could lose the Oscar to Crash, the real shock is just now setting in:

Brokeback may have changed nothing.

That's the bottom line from Entertainment Weekly. The Hollywood establishment continues to be squeamish when it comes to fleshing out gay characters on the silver screen.

The silver lining, according to EW?

Television is the new frontier when it comes to characters who just happen not to be straight.

Regardless of whether the number of gay characters is up or down this year, the letters LGBT have become a part of television's alphabet soup, and audiences consume it, in their living rooms, by the millions.

Read more HERE

LGBTTTIQQA WTF?

The gay community likes to pretend it's an embracing umbrella, with an acronym for everyone.

Just by choosing not to use the well worn acronyms to portray us, I tread on dangerous activist waters, with the mistaken assumption that I'm bigoted or self-hating by not embracing all the colors of the rainbow flag at all times.

Truth is, just like any broad community, we are not one. The G's and the L's don't always get along and the B's are often looked at with a wary eye, let alone the T's and I's who don't necessarily have the same needs as the rest of the crowd. Then you have the Q and A's who don't quite fit in all the time either. Claiming otherwise is simply pretending that it's all one big happy family for the sake of presenting a united front.

I mention all this after reading a thoughtful column over at Salon that deals with all of this, in light of the current push to pass the Employment Non-Discrimination Act (ENDA) in congress. There's also a full explanation of the acronyms in question there too.

After 30 years of trying, there is finally a chance to pass a federal law supporting gay rights. This should be an exciting day for sexual orientation rights. So of course the acronym crowd is up in arms, fighting it. It's sad.

Is it a perfect piece of legislation?

Of course not. It blatantly excludes some the acronyms above that still make members of congress squeamish.

Is it a gigantic step in the right direction for all those acronyms? Absolutely.

Those same members of congress are the brave ones who are, for once, willing to make gay rights a federal right. I can't for my life see how this wouldn't be an enormous first step for everyone.

Let's be clear on this: Federal Rights for gay people do not exist at the moment. It's only at the state level that a patchwork of laws have been enacted.

It's hard to remember sometimes that while the Civil War granted African Americans freedom, it took well into the next century for them to achieve actual civil rights on a federal level. It did not happen in one day. It was a result of years of finding friends and allies who helped nudge the country to the point where it became politically possible to make real changes. It did not happen overnight, with one law. For that matter, the African American community is still beating the civil rights drum to this day.

The gay community isn't that different.

There are real and tangible signs of growing acceptance of the gay community in this country. Each year more and more companies offer domestic partner benefits. The days of social gatherings with darkened windows and alley entrances are giving way to mainstream acceptance. While Dynasty was forced to reign in it's gay characters just a few decades ago, hit shows like Ugly Betty go much farther than anyone might have imagined today.

Maybe it is time to simplify again and just call it a gay rights movement, acknowledging that a movement by definition is a conglomeration of individuals constantly striving for a united change -- change that by nature doesn't come all at once.

By getting rid of the acronym you stop muddling the message.

We can argue our differences amongst ourselves as we always have, and will continue to do so. It's how the G added an L and then a B and then the rest. Myopically focusing on all-inclusive acronyms, and the need for all to be acknowledged at all times, just helps divide and conquer our goals. It makes a point of showcasing our divisions instead of what unites us. Equality should be equality for all, of course. By trying to be everything to everyone we may just end up with equality for none.

This is more relevant this week as we mark National Coming Out Day.

Be proud of who you are and live your life openly, regardless of which letter of the alphabet you claim as your own. It is only because our friends, neighbors and coworkers are aware and accepting of us, that congress would even come close to considering gay rights on a federal level.

I am very thankful for this.

I also know there is still much more to be done -- for all of us.

If you execute someone, do they cease to exist?

Today, while speaking at Columbia University, Iranian president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad was asked about recent executions of homosexuals in his country. His answer:

“In Iran we don’t have homosexuals like in your country. In Iran we do not have this phenomenon. I don’t know who’s told you that we have this.”

-Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, President of the Islamic Republic of Iran

There's so much I could say about this, but Canada's CBC News has a video from earlier this year that says it better.

CLICK HERE TO SEE THE CBC REPORT

"We know what a person thinks not when he tells us what he thinks, but by his actions."

-Isaac Bashevis Singer

"They had a mother and a father — and they abused them."

There was a landmark adoption this week in Colorado.

The big deal?

Legally, for the first time in Colorado, the children have two legal mothers. Jeannie DiClementi and Mary Ross, were the first gay couple allowed to adopt childen jointly in Colorado thanks to the new so-called second parent adoption law passed in the statehouse earlier this year.

"This law gives children in a one-parent family a chance to grow up in a two-parent home," [Colorado Governor Bill] Ritter said then. "This law will give children a better chance to succeed."

It may not be marriage or civil unions just yet, but it's just as important. I wish DiClementi and Ross the best for their new family!

The Rocky Mountain News has more here.